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Script


Lee: "I'm Lee Ping, the guy who got set up for the mother of all pranks at the weirdest high school in existence. So weird, we got the Loch Ness Monster's third cousin, the Tazelwurm, as a mascot. It supposedly has magical whiskers that can reverse any curse, so the Outcast clique have been desperate to get their hands on one. To try to reverse their curse of being terminally uncool." [Pictures of the Outcasts and the Red Tazelwurm are shown.] "I don't know if it worked out for them yet, but the Taz has definitely been helping me." [Pictures of the Red Tazelwurm helping appear.] "He got my hands on this ancient skeleton key, the one Lynch wants so bad. Lynch told me, 'the time is near'. But before I could learn anything else, those weird Grim Reaper-looking hazmats showed up." [Pictures of the robots are shown.] "How'd they find out about our secret rendezvous?"
Detentionaire

[A circular hole is knocked through a brick wall and a blue tazelwurm crawls through it. It is followed by another tazelwurm. In the room are the Outcasts and Lee, hiding behind some boxes.]
Jenny: [whispering] "Any chance you have an escape plan?"
Lee: "I'm gonna go with no on this one."
[A blue tazelwurm climbs to the top of their barricade and hisses at them until it is shocked by a cleaner holding a shock prod. The cleaner then turns towards the teenagers.]
Lee, Jenny, Lou, and Deuce: "AAAH!"


Earlier that day...8:01 AM
[Lee, Cam, and Holger are on a streetcar.]
Lee: "Lynch didn't say why he wanted the key so bad. Maybe it's to get back in the tunnels?"
Holger: [shrugging] "Maybe Lynchy forgot lucky sherdoofaloofen down inside there. Holger would be shankterbombed if he was losing his sherdoofaloofen."
Lee: "What's a–" [Holger puts on a false mustache.] "Oh."
Camillio: [muttering] "Sometimes it's better not to ask."
[The Outcasts board the bus. They are followed by Brad.]
Brad: [amazed] "Wow. A real streetcar." [He sniffs the air.] "It smells just like I thought it would. Don't worry everyone! My limo did not explode. I'm just taking the streetcar to research a role for my dad's new movie, Brick McSlam: Streetcar Justice. No One Rides for Free!" [The streetcar starts.] "Whoa!"
[Brad loses his balance and stumbles down the length of the streetcar. Cam chuckles.]
Camillio: "I think they're running out of ideas for Brick McSlam movies, man. Nothing exciting happens on a streetcar!"
[The streetcar enters a tunnel, and intermittently goes through patches of dim light and darkness.]
Holger: [scared] "Ooh-hoo-hoo, ooh, scary rolling blackness!" [He holds on to Cam.]
Camillio: [annoyed] "Dude! We go through this tunnel like every day!"
[When the streetcar gets out of the tunnel, Lee's backpack has vanished. Lee notices when he reaches for it to go to school.]
Lee: "My backpack!" [He runs after his friends.] "Hey! Did you guys grab my bag?"
Camillio: [shrugging] "Sorry, bro."
Holger: "Uh-uh."
Lee: [frantic] "Someone stole it! And the key was in there!" [He runs towards school.]
Holger: "Oh, no. Now Lee is to be–shankterbombed."
[At school, there's a long line for retinal scans. Biffy is in the back. Lee runs up to the bully.]
Lee: "Biff! Someone stole my bag. It must've been Lynch."
Biffy: "Really? Did you see Lynch anywhere, guy's pretty hard to miss."
Lee: "No, but he's obviously working with one of the other students! Like–him!" [He points.] "Emo Joe! He was on the streetcar!"
Holger: "Ah-ha!" [He runs over, steals Giuseppe's backpack, and unzips it.] "Vhat is being inside of here?" [Several spiders crawl onto Holger's arms.] "AAAAAAAAHHHHH!"
[Holger tosses the bag away and dives into Cam's arms. Biffy reaches out and catches the bag before Giuseppe can get it.]
Biffy: "Answer the question avoid my wrath. Do you have Lee's bag?"
Principal General Barrage: [walking up] "Droopy McPoopy, is Big Boy McGenta here bothering you?"
Biffy: "Nope."
Principal General Barrage: "I wasn't addressing you private!"
Biffy: "Oh, sorry, I'm not Droopy McPoopy?"
[Giuseppe quietly takes his bag back and hustles off.]
Principal General Barrage: "That's two detentions for you! Since you obviously can't keep your greasy grimy gravy-covered lips from flappity-wapping all the ding-dong day!" [He exhales heavily.] "Count 'em. One, two. One at lunch, and one after school."
Biffy: "Oh well. Still leaves me my morning spare."
Principal General Barrage: [irked] "Oh, really? Then let's go for a punishment trifecta. Three detentions. Maybe that'll teach you to leave lanky doodle dandies alone. And the lippity-zip-nip at home!"
[The general walks away. Lee comes up to Biffy.]
Lee: [surprised] "You actually wanted more detention?"
Biffy: [whispering] "I've been working on a gadget to block cell phone interference in the detention room. And now, I can get started on it! Booyeah!"
[Biffy and Lee walk up to the cleaners, get their retinas scanned, and enter the schoolyard. Cam and Holger follow.]
Camillio: "Aw, man, dude, they totally heistified the bag right under our noses! Our man Lee should be able to count on us better than that!" [He stumbles into the yard, blind.]
Holger: [sad] "Yeah! Ve are terrible!" [He smiles for the scanner and then enters the yard.]
Camillio: "But I'm school prez, yo! That means I gotta be able to do something!"
Holger: "Prezzy gets to choose candy in vending machine, ja? That is very something, no?"
Camillio: [enthusiastic] "Hot doggity doggone, bro! I got it! Gimme that shurdoofy thing!"
Holger: [correcting him] "Ah. The sherdoofaloofen?"
Camillio: "Yeah that." [Holger hands the mustache over.] "I totally know how to solve this case, homeslice homington! But I need your help!"

[Everyone in the streetcar is in Lee's first class.]
Lee: "I know one of them took it, but who?"
[Lou turns around, looks at Lee, and grins as he switches the thumb he's sucking. Lee gets a call.]
Lee: [answering] "Cam! What's up?"
Camillio: "Just calling to say chillax, bro. Everything's under control 'cause Camsky and Dutch are on the case!"
Lee: "Camski and what? Should I be worried? What are you guys doing?"
[Cam hangs up on Lee. Shortly thereafter, his voice comes over the PA system.]
Camillio: "Lou Black, please report to the student council room. Lou Black."
[Lou gets up and leaves the room.]
Lee: "Camsky and Dutch, I sure hope you know what you're doing."


[Camsky and Dutch are in the student council room, getting ready to interrogate suspects.]
Camillio: "We're so gonna find out who the thief is, dude." [turning on a bright lamp] "Cop show styles. Should I be like good cop or bad cop?"
Holger: "No way José person! Holgermiester will be...Doctor Cop!"
Camillio: "Yeah!" [realizing] "Wh-wh-what?" [Holger puts on a costume.] "Doctor cop?"
Holger: "Doctor Detective Cop. Top rated show in home country. Always solving the case and curing the illness at same time."
Camillio: "'Kay, dude, stop that. Where do you get all this stuff anyway?" [He hears a sucking noise and turns to see Lou.] "Oh. Hey bro. How long you been there?"
Lou: [taking his thumb out] "Can we get on with this? I've got classes to be at, and a thumb to suck." [He returns his thumb to his mouth. Suddenly, Cam shines the lamp on him.] "Whoa!"
Camillio: "Alright, spill. And I don't mean thumb spit, man. What'd you do with Lee's backpack, ese?"
Lou: "What would I want Lee's bag for?"
Holger: [putting a sketch on the desk] "Tell me, thumb-sucking babyman, vhat is being this goldfish's name, hmm, hmm?"
Lou: "Umm...Goldy?"
Holger: "That is being correct. You may go. But, you should have mole looked at immediately right-nowsies. Okay?"
[Lou gets up and leaves. As soon as he's gone, Cam looks at Holger angrily.]
Camillio: "Dude! What was that? You call that–interrogating?"
Holger: "Trust me, Sir Sherdoofaloofen, Doctor Detective Cop never loses a case. Or, a patient."


[Tina is reporting on the fence again.]
Tina: "Good morning A. Nigma High! I'm standing in front of the illegal fence that continues to be constructed despite a protest yesterday by the entire student body. And look!" [The camera focuses on a guard tower, in which an eyebot is keeping watch.] "Those are eyebots in guard towers. What's next? Barbed wire, prison uniforms?"
[In the background, the Outcasts walk by. Jenny is carrying Lee's bag.]
Lee: [shocked] "My backpack! It was Jenny!" [He raises his hand.] "Mr. Langhorne? The goulash special yesterday just called, it needs to get outta me. Like right now."


[Biffy and Mrs. Rumplekittykat are in detention.]
Biffy: "C'mon, chew faster! We need this thing up and running."
[Biffy pops a piece of gum into his mouth and rolls the foil it came in between his hands. When the gum and foil are right, he affixes a piece of gum to the door and embeds the foil in the gum. After a few renditions of this, he covers the apparatus in grey paint so that it matches the door.]
Biffy: "If this works, it'll boost our signal and break through whatever they're using to jam it. Pretty snappy eh Rumplekittykat, ehh?"
[The cat blows a bubble.]


[An environmentalist is the next one on the interrogation block.]
Holger: "Vere being the backpack, Suzie? And, is you getting enough iron in your diet, yes, no, or maybe so, mmm?"
Camillio: [leaning over the table] "Back it up with the doctor mumbo-jumbo DDC. You have motive, and opportunity Suzie-Q. Admit it! You hate Lee! You wanted revenge!"
Principal General Barrage: [throwing the door open] "What in the name of mulberry Mondays, is going on here? And who authorized you to call students to your council base of operations?"
Camillio: "Hey, El Presidente, that's me, totally has authority to investigate a school theft, okay?"
Principal General Barrage: [outraged] "Thievery? In my school?"
Camillio: "And the truth, is like totally gonna come out. We're interrogating perps, man! Camsky and Dutch styles!"
Principal General Barrage: "Did you say, in-ter-ro-ga-tion?" [happy] "Why don't you pour raspberry honey chutney directly into my ears?" [raspy] "Interrogation, is one of my many spec-i-alities."
[The principal laughs evilly. Suzie begins to shake with fright.]


[Lee runs out of the school and over to Tina, who is still being filmed.]
Lee: "Tina! Hey, did you see Jenny?"
Tina: [pointing] "Over there with Deuce and Lou. Why?"
[Upon realizing they've been spotted, the Outcasts run around the corner of the school.]
Lee: [to the Outcasts] "Hey wait!" [to Tina] "Sorry Tina, no time to chat, they, um, I'll explain later!" [He runs after the Outcasts.]
Tina: [exasperatedly to herself] "Like I've never heard that before!" [worried] "And why is he so interested where Jenny is all of the sudden?" [realizing she's still on camera] "Are you still filming? STOP!"
[Tina knocks the camera away from Stepak. Meanwhile, the Outcasts dive into a bush by the fence.]
Lee: "Nice disappearing trick. But you're not getting away with my key."
[Lee runs through the bush and finds a bunch of other bushes. He looks around for the Outcasts, knocks a couple of boards covering a hole loose, and falls down the hole.]
Lee: "Whoa! AAAAAHHH!"


[Lee flails his arms out and grabs onto a rung on a rope ladder.]
Lee: "Whew. That was–" [The rung breaks.] "Ahh!" [He hits the ground hard.] "Ouch!" [He lifts himself up and finds his backpack beneath him.] "Hey, my backpack!" [hunting inside] "And the key's gone! Aw man, the Outcasts took it for sure!" [taking out his phone] "Better give Camsky an update."
Camillio: [answering] "Pingsterino! Can't talk right now. Barrage is here and uh, kinda like helping with the interrogations."
Principal General Barrage: [suspicious] "Pingsterino? Is that Pingy Ping Pingy?"
Camillio: "Uh, yo, uh, just one second bro."
Lee: "Keep him busy, and whatever you do, don't let him leave." [He puts his earpiece in.] "The Outcasts have my key, and I'm getting it back."
[Cam and Lee hang up. Barrage is heading for the door.]
Camillio: [worried] "No-ho no wait, Barrage! Dude. Brad's next and he's like, he's tough man, y'know, we're totally gonna need your mad interrogation skills on this one!"
[Brad walks in with a camera.]
Brad: "Oh, hey." [Barrage growls. Brad sets up the camera.] "You guys don't mind if I put this on my reel, do you?"
Camillio: "Just tell us what you know, bro."
Brad: "Wait. Small note. Can you go harder on me? In Brick McSlam: Streetcar Justice No One Rides for Free! My character gets busted by transit cops, who break him down to admit his pass has expired. Okay? ACTION!"
Principal General Barrage: [sinisterly] "You wanna be broken, son?" [He chuckles slightly and then crushes his ceramic mug with his bare hand. Cam gulps.]


[Biffy has gotten a USB connection from outside the room. He plugs it into his phone and grins.]
Biffy: "And away we go."
[With the connection, Biffy is able to track Lee as he runs through the underground tunnels the hole connected to. Lee's phone rings, and he answers.]
Biffy: "Hey. Dude."
Lee: [happy] "Biffy! Whatever you did, you're a genius! Quick, you gotta help me. I'm totally lost down here."
Biffy: [hi-fiving his cat] "Yeah, I see where you are. Down in the tunnels, surprise surprise."
Lou: "C'mon, guys! Run!"
[The Outcasts are being chased by a blue tazelwurm. They run past Lee.]
Lee: [scared] "Biffy, blue taz alert. I need an exit, now!"
Biffy: [directing traffic] "Take the first right, then another right, then left, right, left, left–"
Lee: [agitated] "Slow down!" [The Outcasts do so.] "No, not you!"
Lou: [tired] "Will you please make up your mind?"
Deuce: [winded] "I am in no kind of shape for all of this running! Whatsoever!"
Lee: "You! Run faster." [to Biffy] "And you, where to next?"
[Biffy doesn't respond. They take off running again until they see an opaque blue shield at the end of the tunnel.]
Lee: "Wait. Stop!" [The group stops.] "Don't go through that!" [He hurls a stick at the shield, and it fries to a crisp.] "Yeah. I had a feeling about that."
[The blue tazelwurm hisses as it approaches them. Lee waves his backpack like a bullfighter's cape.]
Lee: "Toro, toro!" [The tazelwurm leaps at the backpack, misses when Lee yanks it away, and slams into the shield.] "Whoa! Wow, that actually worked!"
Deuce: "That was awesome!"
Jenny: "Aw yeah!"
Biffy: "Celebrate later, right now you gotta get going before more show up. Right, then right again, then–"
Lee: "Hold on." [He turns to the Outcasts.] "Seriously. Give me back my key. Why did you take it? Didn't I help you out when you wanted that Taz whisker?"
Jenny: [guiltily] "Yeah, okay, we took your key. But we like, had to." [She hands it over.] "We're like, totally cursed to be uncool!"
Lee: "So–you're telling me Lynch didn't force you to steal it?"
Deuce: "Who's Lynch? O-or did you say lunch? I'd be into some lunch."
Lee: "So the Taz whisker didn't work?"
Lou: "That PSA we saw in class said a taz whisker could cure any curse."
[Lou remembers how the Outcasts tried to use the whisker. They are sitting in a candlelit attic.]
Memory Lou: "What do we even do with it?"
Memory Jenny: [wrestling with a book] "I'm sure something's in here. If I could get this stupid thing to open!"
Memory Lou: "Maybe we just talk to the whisker."
Memory Deuce: "O-or maybe we just, um, eat it?" [He pops the whisker in his mouth.]
Memory Lou: [frantic] "NO! We don't eat it! Drop it. Drop it."
[In his memory, Deuce spits out the whisker, and it falls into a candle, where it goes up in flames.]
Jenny: [pulling a book from her backpack] "So, now this is all we have left."
Lee: [shocked] "Where'd you find that?"
Jenny: "Cool, huh? In the library. But it won't open! Guh!"
Lee: "So you dug a hole down here?"
Deuce: "Uh-huh. It took weeks. But, the dirt was delicious."
Jenny: "But once we were down–"
Lee: "You needed my key to open all the other locked doors? So you thought you'd just steal it?"
[The Outcasts look at each other guiltily.]
Deuce: "Uh."
Lou: "Pretty much."
Jenny: "We figured since nobody likes the Outcasts anyways, asking for help was nothing but a gigantic waste of time."
Lee: "Hey I hooked you up last time. You could've asked."
Jenny: "Okay, fine. I'm asking." [She reaches for the key.]
Lee: [holding it away] "Uh-uh. But I will get you another whisker next time I see Taz."
[Jenny smiles as she returns her finger to her nose. Lee nervously returns her smile.]
Lou: "No! We have waited long enough! I want a new whisker! Today!"
[An alarm goes off.]
Male Council Member: [on a PA system] "Emergency! The Pyramid Room is under attack by tazelwurms! Send help immediately!"
[Some cleaners are heard heading towards the shield from the other side.]
Lee: "Hide!"
[The group ducks into a side tunnel. The cleaners turn the shield off as they run through it. Shortly thereafter, the shield comes back on.]
Lou: [excited] "You hear that guys? Tazelwurms! As in plural! There'll be so many whiskers to choose from!" [He runs after the cleaners.]
Lee: "He's talking about more blue tazelwurms! Lou! Come back!"
[Lee gives chase, and the other two Outcasts follow.]


[Interrogations are still going on inside the student council room.]
Holger: "Holger no asking again, okay? Do it!"
[The boy being interrogated picks up a pair of dice, shakes them in his hand, and rolls them. They come up as a pair of sixes.]
Holger: "Boxcars!" [Cam and Barrage look at each other confusedly.] "Okay, maybe you be telling the teensy bit of truth, ja? Hmm. You no steal the backpack. But maybe your parents–" [He grabs the boy's ear.]
Short Boy: "Hey!"
Holger: "–suffer from wax buildup in earholes! Nod never if so yes."
[Confused, the boy nods.]
Principal General Barrage: "I want this no-good thief found, and punished!"


[A group of cleaners comes to another shielded room. Their leader holds up its left arm to the shield. The shield scans it, reads a symbol on it, and lets the cleaners in. Lou runs in after them, and Lee follows.]
Lee: "Lou, stop!"
[The shield comes up again, cutting Lee and Lou off from Deuce and Jenny. Suddenly, it shuts off again.]
Jenny: [whispering] "Come back before it closes!" [The shield goes up.]
Lou: "No, I need that Tazelwurm whisker so I can be cool again!"
[The shield goes down, and Jenny and Deuce sneak across. It goes up again.]
Jenny: [whispering] "Are you crazy?!? Now we're trapped!"
Lou: [whispering] "Ssh. Check it out! What's going on?"
[The group ducks behind a barricade of containers. The male council member is inside a shielded cube, and the cleaners are fighting off tazelwurms, many of whom are entering the room by digging tunnels from below.]
Deuce: "That is so not good! Bye!" [He runs away and smacks into the shield, where he gets an electric shock.] "Ow! That hurts!" [Getting an idea, he sticks his tongue out at it and gets shocked again.] "Ow! That hurts too!"
[Deuce rejoins his friends. Some more tazelwurms crawl out of a freshly-created hole in the wall near them.]
Jenny: [whispering] "Any chance you have an escape plan?"
Lee: "I'm gonna go with no on this one."


[A blue tazelwurm climbs to the top of the barricade and hisses at the Outcasts. A cleaner uses an electrified prong to shock it into submission and then turns to the group of teenagers. Suddenly, the cleaner is tackled by another blue tazelwurm, and the prong flies into Deuce's hands.]
Deuce: [excited] "Barbecue tazelwurm!"
Lee: [unimpressed] "Yeah. Don't get any ideas."
Jenny: "Okay, sorry to ask the obvious, but how are we getting outta here?!?"
Lee: "Wait. What's going on over there?"
[Behind another shield, a Council member is hard at work on a computer. He has a reaper to guard him, just in case.]
Male Council Member: "It's no use! I can't control the tazelports! This blasted pyramid is causing some kind of interference!" [to the cleaners] "Keep them off the generator or else–"
[The blue tazelwurms take down the cleaners guarding the shield generator and bite through the wires that supply it with its power. The shields around the man and around the room go down.]
Jenny: [excited] "Boom! Ah, look Lee, we can get outta here now!"
Male Council Member: "Fall back! Retreat!" [He is holding a key in his right hand.]
Lee: "Hey. Another key! Just like mine!"


[Brandy is the latest victim called in for interrogation.]
Camillio: "So. Brandy Silver. Is that right?"
Brandy: "What is that thing, on your lip?"
[Cam straightens his fake mustache.]
Camillio: "Just answer the questions, please. Did you take the backpack on the streetcar?"
Brandy: "Do I look like the kind of girl who would be interested in a backpack? Or the streetcar? Ew!"
Camillio: "Oh yeah? Well fair enough. So, what would you be interested in?"
Brandy: "I'd tell you officer, but I wouldn't want my boyfriend to get jealous."
[Holger and Barrage look at each other.]
Camillio: [quickly] "Moving on, so do you confess?"
Brandy: "Never! Not even if you were to, say, take me to a really nice restaurant at around seven P.M. this Saturday night followed by a movie followed by some dancing! I'll never tell you anything, never!"
Camillio: [pounding his fists on the table] "Oh yeah? Ouch. Well I guess we'll just have to see about that, say around Saturday night at seven, and don't be late!"
Brandy: "Fine! Wear a nice jacket!"
Camillio: "What ever! You're free to go!"
[Barrage gapes as Brandy walks out of the room. Holger sticks a tongue depressor in his mouth and shines a light on him, so Barrage pushes the Viking away.]


[The Council member runs over to a hovercraft parked in a tunnel while the reaper protects him.]
Male Council Member: "Hold them off!"
[The man gets into the hovercraft and pulls away. The reaper follows him.]
Lee: "Okay. What was that big dude up to?"
Jenny: "Who cares! Hello, the doors are open again. Let's go already!"
Lee: "You guys go. I'll be right back." [He darts after the Council member.]
Jenny: "No, we gotta get outta here!" [turning to the other Outcasts] "Guys, we have to help!"
Lou: "No way! You heard your new crush he said to go!" [He and Deuce abscond.]
Jenny: "He's not my new–uh! C'mon seriously, don't be jerks. He'd help us."
[Getting no response, Jenny rolls her eyes and sighs before running after Lee.]


[Holger has set out several plates of cheese in front of Irwin.]
Holger: "Identify these cheeses in alphabetical of orders. And if you no stealing the backpack perhaps it was the delicious cheeses that stole it. Can you be naming the guilty cheese?"
Principal General Barrage: [frustrated] "Is this an interrogation or a cooking class?"


[Lee has gone over to the computer.]
Lee: [examining it] "What was he up to?" [He looks at a printout from the computer.] "Huh?" [He goes over to the pyramid and spots the keyholes.] "My key can open this too? But there's a spot for two keys! And that big dude had the other one!"
Lou: [coming back] "Jenny look out!"
Jenny: "Huh?"
[A blue tazelwurm lunges for her. Lee dives into Jenny, knocking her out of the tazelwurm's way.]
Jenny: "The book!" [The blue tazelwurm puts a protective claw on the book.]
Lou: "Lee! Maybe this can help!" [He takes the electric weapon from Deuce.] "How do you turn it–" [It fizzles.] "–wait got it!"
Lee: "No, wait!" [Lou throws it over.] "Turn it off first!"
Lou: [squeaky] "My bad!"
[Lee and Jenny dodge the prongs, and it hits the tazelwurm, knocking it out cold. Lee gets Jenny's bag and hands it to her.]
Lee: "C'mon! That book had better be important."
[A blue tazelwurm digs out of the ground behind Lou and Deuce.]
Deuce: [scared] "Nice mean monster."
Lou: [waving a severed cleaner arm at it] "Go away! Go! Shoo!"
[Lee and Jenny run over. Lee grabs the arm and hurls it at the blue tazelwurm. The tazelwurm dodges, and the arm comes to rest in a small fireplace-like enclave. The group takes off.]
Lee: "C'mon!"


[Biffy has placed a foil crown on the head of Niles Peg.]
Biffy: "Check this out." [His phone charges from the crown.] "Oh yeah! Who da–" [The crown shocks him, and his phone rings.] "Ow!" [answering] "Yo! Yeah sorry the connection isn't perfected yet, I'm working on it."
Lee: "We need a way out or we're dead!"
Biffy: "Okay, keep your pants on, nobody wants that." [using his laptop] "One juicy escape plan, coming up!" [finding a route] "Take the first right, the library entrance is straight ahead."
[Lee does as instructed, and the Outcasts follow. They're on the home stretch when Deuce trips over a rock.]
Deuce: "Ow!"
Jenny: "Oh no! Deuce!"
Deuce: [as the blue tazelwurm approaches] "Aah!"
[Suddenly, the Red Tazelwurm leaps out of nowhere and begins fighting off the blue tazelwurm.]
Lee: "Wow that was ironic, something actually almost ate Deuce."
[More blue tazelwurms enter the tunnel. Deuce gets up and runs as the Red Tazelwurm confronts them, giving him time to escape. Lee takes out his key and opens the door. The Outcasts run through.]
Lee: [to the Red Tazelwurm] "We're cleared! You coming?"
[The Red Tazelwurm hisses and accepts the invitation, getting through just before the door shuts.]


Holger: [examining Beth's hand] "Der, flooj, moot, svoo, eleven, goodie!" [He laughs and hands Beth his magnifying glass.] "Now do me!"
Principal General Barrage: [impressed] "Biscuits and cannon fire! The kid's loopdy-loo! But he's a master interrogator. The perp'll tell him anything to make it stop!"


[Lee, the Red Tazelwurm, and the Outcasts run down the hall.]
Lee: "I'm so in trouble. That was my longest bathroom break ever!"
Lou: "Uh, Lee, you think you could uh–" [He points to the Red Tazelwurm.] "Y'know?"
Lee: "Right. Got it." [They stop.] "Hey Taz, you okay with sliding us one of your whiskers?"
[The Red Tazelwurm rolls its eyes but plucks a whisker from its chin and hands it to Lee.]
Lee: "Thanks buddy." [handing it to Lou] "Try not to burn it this time."
[The Red Tazelwurm growls and goes over to Jenny.]
Jenny: [holding up her book to protect herself] "Uh, why is it mad at me?"
[The Red Tazelwurm bites into the book. Its fangs fit the two holes on the cover perfectly. The book opens, and the Red Tazelwurm leaves.]
Jenny: [joyous] "The Taz was the key to opening the book all along! Ha! That is so wild."
Lee: "Whoa! And if the Taz says it's important, it most definitely is."
[The bell rings.]
Mr. Langhorne: "Ahem!" [He is standing right behind Lee.]
Lee: "Um, I can–" [The teacher snatches the bathroom pass back.] "Explain?"


[Cam, Holger, and Barrage are still in the interrogation room.]
Camillio: "M'kay, next suspect."
Holger: "No! No more! The case, is cured, and solved!"
Camillio: [nervous] "Uh, what? No, Holg, we need to keep interrogating man. Leave no stone unturned and all that jazz yo!"
Holger: "Nikselnorf to that, Mister Moustache. All clues and the symptoms leading to handy-dandy wrapdown of case." [laying out his evidence] "Ninth-grade boy rolled the twelves. Brandy making cheating times with the Mister Moustache. Irwin cheese expert with slight neck rash. And Suzie, needing the iron supplement and to wash her ears more often. Jenny of the Outcasts is stealing the Lee of Pings backpack!"
Principal General Barrage: [incensed] "All of this was for that snot-nosed little gooberpuke?"
Camillio: [confused] "But–none of that like makes any sense."
Holger: [laughing] "Doctor Detective Cop never explains making-sense parts! Okay friend? But, he do have one final clue!" [He puts the fish sketch on the table.] "Name was not Goldy, name is Margie! Lou is liar!" [He laughs.]
Principal General Barrage: "If Jenny is the thief, she's gotta be brought to justice tout suite!" [He stomps out of the room.] "Good work! Weirdo." [He slams the door.]


[Lee and Jenny are working together on the book in class while Tina eyes them worriedly.]
Jenny: [pointing at the book] "What's this? It looks like–" [They look at Lee's tattoo, which matches it.]
Lee and Jenny: "Weird."
[The principal enters the room and marches over to Lee and Jenny.]
Principal General Barrage: "Did you take Ping's fancy little backpack? Full of snips and snails and puppy dog's entrails?"
Lee: "Wait, but it's all a big misunderstanding. She didn't mean t–"
Principal General Barrage: "Detention for you, missy! One week!" [The principal storms away, but then comes back.] "And get that finger out of your nose, it's de-sgusting." [He leaves.]
Jenny: "Welp, guess we'll have more time together to research this book, hey pal? Score!"
[Tina frowns and turns away from them.]


[That night, Lee has a video chat with Jenny.]
Lee: "There were two keyholes on that pyramid. That big guy has one and I have the other."
Jenny: "Yeah, well, you probably need both to open it, like the Taz's teeth and my book? Gee, whadda you think could be in there?"
Lee: "Whatever it is, that must be why Lynch was after the key. I better hide it where no one'll find it." [He stashes it under his bed.] "There. Totally safe."
[Lee does not notice the existence of a small bug almost directly above the key's hiding place.]

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